I gave her all the mark-room she asked for — how am I the one disqualified?

Because mark-room doesn't cancel right of way. If the inside boat is also the right-of-way boat — she's on starboard while you're on port — you owe her mark-room under Rule 18.2(a) and must keep clear under Rule 10. She may still luff, as long as she gives room under Rule 16.1. Fail to keep clear and the foul is yours. (World Sailing Case 75.)

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Next on this shelf — The Leeward Mark